Female; a decision maker in her marriage

Marriage is one of the relationships which Islam encourages and attaches most importance with and therefore, ensures spouses’ equal rights to guarantee happiness, marital stability, and permanence in this relationship. It is often said that marriage relationship is like a vehicle and husband and wife are its wheels who carry this vehicle throughout their life. So, it is very important that both, husband and wife, have mutual correspondence and understanding with each other to drag the vehicle of life successfully.

Sometimes, it happens that husband and wife lack this correspondence and as a result, they entangle themselves in unpleasant and nasty wedlock. Inequality in the rights of men and women to choose their life partner is the reason behind all this.
In our society, this inequality prevails even today. Nowadays, what happens is that men are allowed to choose their life partner, they are allowed to marry someone they want to.

On the other hand, girls have no right to decide which guy they want to get married to. In such cases, girls’ parents select their spouse and girls are supposed to sit silently and say yes to their decision. These types of absurd activities are practiced even today where girls are not given the rights to choose their life partner with whom they have to spend their whole life.

Islam awards girls with the right to choose their spouse. But it does not mean that girls should marry someone they like without the permission of their parents. It is the responsibility of parents to make sure their children do not make the wrong choice. But neither they should impose their will on the other, nor they have the right to do so. Parents have no right to force their daughter to marry someone, at the same time, the daughter also does not have the right to marry someone without her parent’s permission. One of the conditions for marriage, as laid down by Islam, is the presence of wali or guardian.

Selecting the right life partner is as much necessary for women as for the men. So, it is very important to give them equal rights in this regard, so that they can make decisions based on their own interests and can lead a happy married life. Marriage is a social contract between husband and wife which they have to retain and hold back for the rest of their life. It is crystal clear that husband and wife cannot live together in a state of well-being if their respective interests clash with each other.

Men and women have different roles to play in this society, but their rights must be same and equal regarding each and every matter of their life.” Life is about choices. Some we regret, some we are proud of. Some will haunt us forever. We are what we chose to be.” (GRAHAM BROWN)
So, we must be careful while choosing someone and making a decision about someone because the things we choose and the decisions we make last with us forever. And women should be given the right to make a decision about their marriage and they must have the liberty to choose their spouse.

Author: Zarmeen Zahid.


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